Eric Johnson,, 417-890-7200

To save you time with the inevitable, “is this race for me?” questions we always get, please see below…

You might get offended if you are:
  • a Republican
  • a Democrat
  • a Whig
  • a star of an 80’s sitcom
  • a scientologist
  • a Wiccan
  • a Christian
  • a Caucasian
  • a nice guy
  • a jerk
  • a hermaphrodite
  • a late bloomer
  • a 70’s love balladeer
  • a Bee Gee
This race is for you if:
  • you are kind if immature
  • you watched lots of tv as a kid instead of reading books
  • you like scavenger hunts
  • you are bored with doing 5K’s
  • you are intimidated by 5K’s but a scavenger hunt sounds cool
  • you didn’t “develop” until you were a junior in high school
  • your kids are stressing you out
  • you are curious enough that someone would put this much time into nonsense that you have to see what the fuss is all about.